Firstly, I apologize for not blogging sooner, but it's been a hectic week. I think I'm coming down with a cold or the flu or perhaps I simply hate my job and feel sick because I hate that place so much...LOL Okay, seriously though, it's probably a cold or the flu or perhaps the weather change. It was so nice last weekend, but then it got so cold!! And it's supposed to be warm again this weekend! What the heck, man? So, yeah...Also, I was told by Phoenix that Little Phoenix thinks I only ever blog about work...So, in that spirit, I'm going to blog about work. JUST KIDDING! No, I'm going to talk about the fair. We went last Sunday and I took pictures to share!
We went to the state fair last year and it was cool, so we thought we'd go again. Seriously, I cannot believe how much it all costs. It was $30 for us to park and go inside. Once inside, we saw the Susan G. Komen trailer and they were offering a free bag if you watched their five-minute video. They also had a program where you could look at different facts and videos about stuff, like breast cancer for African-Americans (I thought it just affected all women in general...) and other things like that. I watched a video about Susan G. Komen because I wanted to know who this Susan lady was...Apparently, she got cancer when she was 33 and ended up dying from it, but before she did, she asked her sister something like, "When I get better, will you help me raise awareness?" (I'm paraphrasing!) Her sister did one better...She started a whole foundation and raised millions of bucks. Dude, I want a sister like that. My sisters would be like,"Umm...What?" LOL Just kidding...kinda. What sucked though was that they had a drawing going on and you had to sign up online and when I went to go answer their questions, the program shut down!! WTF!? Phoenix got to enter, but I did not! Just my luck, I tell you!
After that, we walked around and looked at some exhibits. I noticed that the cost of the games had gone up. I don't play the games, but I was just looking. It was like 7 tickets per game. The tickets were like 10 for $5. Seriously? I could go down to TJ and buy an over-sized stuffed animal for $2 and still have enough change left over from my five-dollar bill to buy some Chicklets and a Corona. Then we got something to eat...This is the best part of the fair--Fair Food!! I bought a corn dog (and not an "acorn dog" like I just typed...lol) while Phoenix got a ham sandwich and Grumpy bought Indian fry bread with beans and cheese. The ham sandwich was all right...The Indian Fry bread was really good...And my corn dog was crap. It tasted as though it had been sitting there all day...Bastards! I think it also made me a bit sick, but whatever. Later, after this had settled, Grumpy and I got funnel cakes from some Pennsylvania Dutch people, or so their sign said. Man, oh man, do I love me some funnel cake with strawberries on top. Soooooo good!
The fair exhibits were all right, but so similar to last year's...I do like seeing the cakes and such though, which I took some pictures of. Phoenix thinks I should enter next year and see what I can do. We'll see. Also, she thinks I should try making a gingerbread house for Christmas...With Little Phoenix's help. I think it'd be cool, but we'll have to see what happens between now and then...Also, the vendors were pretty much the same, except that they weren't as giving as last year...I swear that people used to hand out samples and such, but people were greedy this year. I think it's the economy, but still...It just sucks.
Basically, we spent nearly a hundred bucks on a whole lot of nothing. However, we did try to get our money's worth by getting two Breast Cancer Awareness bags, two bags from the Census bureau (Shouldn't they have been counting people and not handing out bags???), free pens from the breast cancer people, and free key chains from the cops that remind us to buckle up. Yeah, we have like $10 worth of junk. LOL It all works out though, right?
Anyway, here are some pictures. I took most of the pictures of the animals. And I really did want a bunny rabbit...I didn't find one that looked mean enough to eat our cat though, so I didn't waste my money. *grins* Enjoy the slide show...
Friday, October 30, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Thanks, Einstein.
Last night I went into work to find out that Lenny, whom I was supposed to be working with, would not be coming in because she had her schedule wrong. Apparently, she had told Tortilla and another girl that she didn't work until Saturday, which wasn't true...She was scheduled for Wednesday and Friday, but failed to appear on both days. Luckily, Tortilla decided to come in, even though it was her day off, but she took her sweet time getting there. She came in at almost 5pm instead of 3pm, like we're normally scheduled. *rolls eyes* Whatever. So then the assistant manager comes over and starts talking to us about what she's going to do with Lenny. She also points out that she needs someone to work Saturday morning shift and then Sunday night, which leads her to look at me. I was all, "I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow morning." She didn't look convinced, but it was true. I also pointed out that I share a car, so making last minute changes to my schedule makes it hard. Again, she didn't seem to care. Then she was trying to get me in on Sunday too, but I'm going to the fair, so I'm not going to work. Seriously, if this lady had her way, I would've worked from this past Wednesday all the way until this coming Friday...Or even worse, had I not been in Cali this past weekend, I would've worked for 12 days straight. Seriously, slave labor! Yes, I want the hours. Yes, I love having money. But do I want to be there every flippin' day dealing with the trash that shops there? HELL NO! It's all a bunch of bullshit and I feel like I made some kind of deal with the devil because these bastards won't leave me the hell alone...
I don't think I've slept all that well since I took this job because working there is killing me. I come home mostly every night pissed off at the world and exhausted, but then I don't sleep well. And forget about trying to nap. (I tried that today and my neighbors were being so loud. Then some idiot people were out in the courtyard being obnoxiously loud. All I want is sleep!) Sure, the customers at work make for wonderful blog material and such, but still...It's not enough. I have found myself correcting the misspellings I find on our whiteboard where other workers leave notes. Like yesterday, it read, "Clean stainless steal." Hmm...I'm not even sure that makes sense. Or the other day it read, "Clean the outside of the rotisary." Again, I don't know what that is...I can assume they mean the "rotisserie", but how can I know for sure? What's sad is that some of these things are misspelled by the managers, even in typed up emails...Hello! It's called "Spell Check"! USE IT! *rolls eyes* Then there are all the people who use the wrong words...Like the one girl the other day kept saying, "Prescribe" and "Prescription", but I have no clue what the hell she meant because those were not the words she meant. OH! And then there are like two old ladies at my work who call me by Lenny's name and not mine, even though I have a name tag that clearly reads HEATHER!! And this other girl's name isn't even close to mine, so there's no excuse! Perhaps they think that since we're both big girls, it's all right or that we look alike...Who the hell knows? I know, I know, what am I expecting working there...I swear I can feel my IQ dropping though as these people suck the very essence of my being from me.
I suppose if I was going to sell my soul to the devil, then I could've at least asked for new knees because mine are not doing well. At my follow-up doctor appointment today, it was a different PA and I told her that my right knee still hurts and goes all "jiggly like Jell-O sometimes", but my left knee is also giving me problems. And they both make the "clicking" noise the other PA had mentioned. Her response was, "Lots of people's knees click all the time. It's a build up of air." I didn't say it was "popping", I said, "clicking". And if you felt it, you'd know what I meant. Plus, it's hard for me to walk long distances because they hurt and forget about playing things like racquetball, handball, and rugby. Just kidding. Rugby is totally fine. *grins* Seriously though, I'm telling the woman that they hurt and her response is, "Put ice packs on them and wrap them when you can." Ahhh, yes, there's nothing quite like those ace bandages that slide down or shift if you move. *rolls eyes* I should've been a doctor. I can sit there and tell people all kinds of bullshit without doing anything for them. Of course, this particular PA was a genius, which she proved when I told her I stopped using the anti-itch cream the other girl prescribed because it made my hands turn bright red and they itched and burned worse than before and her response was, "Oh. Don't use it then." Umm...Yeah, I got that memo when the crap made me scratch my hands until they nearly bled. Thanks, Einstein. I do love though that I can go to the doctor, but it'd be nice to get them to do something other than take my $15 co-pay and tell me what I already know...
I don't think I've slept all that well since I took this job because working there is killing me. I come home mostly every night pissed off at the world and exhausted, but then I don't sleep well. And forget about trying to nap. (I tried that today and my neighbors were being so loud. Then some idiot people were out in the courtyard being obnoxiously loud. All I want is sleep!) Sure, the customers at work make for wonderful blog material and such, but still...It's not enough. I have found myself correcting the misspellings I find on our whiteboard where other workers leave notes. Like yesterday, it read, "Clean stainless steal." Hmm...I'm not even sure that makes sense. Or the other day it read, "Clean the outside of the rotisary." Again, I don't know what that is...I can assume they mean the "rotisserie", but how can I know for sure? What's sad is that some of these things are misspelled by the managers, even in typed up emails...Hello! It's called "Spell Check"! USE IT! *rolls eyes* Then there are all the people who use the wrong words...Like the one girl the other day kept saying, "Prescribe" and "Prescription", but I have no clue what the hell she meant because those were not the words she meant. OH! And then there are like two old ladies at my work who call me by Lenny's name and not mine, even though I have a name tag that clearly reads HEATHER!! And this other girl's name isn't even close to mine, so there's no excuse! Perhaps they think that since we're both big girls, it's all right or that we look alike...Who the hell knows? I know, I know, what am I expecting working there...I swear I can feel my IQ dropping though as these people suck the very essence of my being from me.
I suppose if I was going to sell my soul to the devil, then I could've at least asked for new knees because mine are not doing well. At my follow-up doctor appointment today, it was a different PA and I told her that my right knee still hurts and goes all "jiggly like Jell-O sometimes", but my left knee is also giving me problems. And they both make the "clicking" noise the other PA had mentioned. Her response was, "Lots of people's knees click all the time. It's a build up of air." I didn't say it was "popping", I said, "clicking". And if you felt it, you'd know what I meant. Plus, it's hard for me to walk long distances because they hurt and forget about playing things like racquetball, handball, and rugby. Just kidding. Rugby is totally fine. *grins* Seriously though, I'm telling the woman that they hurt and her response is, "Put ice packs on them and wrap them when you can." Ahhh, yes, there's nothing quite like those ace bandages that slide down or shift if you move. *rolls eyes* I should've been a doctor. I can sit there and tell people all kinds of bullshit without doing anything for them. Of course, this particular PA was a genius, which she proved when I told her I stopped using the anti-itch cream the other girl prescribed because it made my hands turn bright red and they itched and burned worse than before and her response was, "Oh. Don't use it then." Umm...Yeah, I got that memo when the crap made me scratch my hands until they nearly bled. Thanks, Einstein. I do love though that I can go to the doctor, but it'd be nice to get them to do something other than take my $15 co-pay and tell me what I already know...
Friday, October 23, 2009
Manners are free!
I'm not sure if I should be offended or not by this comment...Let me tell you what it is and perhaps you can help me out. So, I was putting on my shoe this morning and I flinched sorta as I put it on because my right foot is killing me because my knee is all kinds of messed up and keeps giving out, so I've been baby-ing it, so my foot hurts from not walking on it correctly. Whew! That was a long sentence. Anyway, so my foot hurts badly, like by the time I get home from work I want to cry it hurts so bad. But I digress...So, I'm putting on my shoe and I get this (Don't quote me on it because it's probably not her exact words, but the gist is there...): "I don't think you're cut out to work." Of course, I was instantly offended and no amount of backpedaling was going to dig her back out, even as she said, "You were meant to be a writer...Or a comedian, but ultimately a writer," as though this is going to save her. I said, "I didn't go to school to be a laborer," which is basically what my job is, mixed with some customer service. Should I be offended or take pride that I am not built to be a grunt? Hmmm...
Speaking of being a grunt...My job sucks ass. Here are a couple of examples of what makes my days so crappy.
Customer 1- "Can I have a pound of the white American cheese?" she asks. "Sure," I reply. "How would you like that cut?" She looks at me as though I'm crazy before telling me that she wants it in a chunk...One chunk, so my cut better be right. And she adds, "I don't want it over a pound...Not even a little bit over." How the hell am I supposed to exactly cut a pound from a block of cheese??? I weighed the cheese and it was close to two pounds, so I tried to slice it in half-ish...Yeah, it was 1.1 pounds. She was impatient and said, "Whatever. I'll take it." Seriously, what the hell did this woman expect!? I was flying blind! I can get stuff right on the dot if I'm slicing it, but not in a chunk!!
Customer 2- "I need half a pound of salami." I told her we were out of hard salami, but that we had Genoa Salami. She rolled her eyes, but said that was fine. When I asked how she wanted it, she said "THIN!" So, I sliced it thin and showed it to her to check, she said, "THINNER!" Seriously, she wanted the shit see-through. Whatever. All I know is that it was jamming the slicer and I had to keep fighting with it, which apparently pissed the lady off, although I don't know why because she wasn't the one wrestling with the machine. Nor did she have to worry about slicing off her fingers and destroying the store's record of 6 months without an employee accident!! She got mad and said, "I'll take whatever you cut already. I have things to do." I said, "Give me just a second, please. I'll get it, but the machine is jamming." She continued to get more pissed at me, as though I could remedy the situation...Whatever. Even another woman in line saw that the woman was being outrageous and that I was fighting with the machine, not getting upset with the woman. Who the hell gets see-through meat anyway!? It's not freakin' piscutto (I don't know how to spell it...It's like bacon, but sliced thinly and doesn't need to be cooked...). When I gave it to her, she said, "It's for a Brazilians recipe I have." I smiled and told her have a good day, but I thought, "Yeah, because Brazilians are known for their love of salami!" *rolls eyes*
Customer 3- This woman came up and as I asked, "How can I help you?" She slams a huge chub of chopped ham on the counter and growls, "Cut this on a one!" Just as I was about to say that I'm not sure I'm allowed to do that, she glared at me and I saw "customer complaint" written all over her face, so I didn't argue. I cut all three pounds of this stupid chub of nasty, fake ham for her. While I did this, a huge line formed at the deli and all this woman did was yell at her kids. Like I couldn't get done with it quickly enough. I found out a few moments after I was done helping her that she's been told repeatedly, even by the managers, that we aren't allowed to do it for her, but she still comes over and yells at anyone who disagrees with her...Good thing I just gave her her way...Although, next time she comes back, we're going to have problems...It's people like her that make reaffirm my belief that children should not be taken out of the house in dirty clothes and without shoes. Sure, it's Phoenix and it's warm, but this doesn't mean kids should be running around shoeless...That's so white trash.
I know, you guys are thinking, "Umm...Haven't you seen that email with the pics of the Walmart shoppers? Didn't you expect this?" Yes, I suppose I did, but I don't deal well with stupidity and grossness. Is that a word? It should be. Our customers, okay not all of them, but a lot of them, are just plain gross. They're trashy and...Never mind. I'm going to stop before I sound snobbish...Here's the thing though, I've never heard of anyone so poor that they could not afford manners, but apparently, that's what's wrong with so many of our customers...Remember folks, good manners are free and should be used liberally.
Speaking of being a grunt...My job sucks ass. Here are a couple of examples of what makes my days so crappy.
Customer 1- "Can I have a pound of the white American cheese?" she asks. "Sure," I reply. "How would you like that cut?" She looks at me as though I'm crazy before telling me that she wants it in a chunk...One chunk, so my cut better be right. And she adds, "I don't want it over a pound...Not even a little bit over." How the hell am I supposed to exactly cut a pound from a block of cheese??? I weighed the cheese and it was close to two pounds, so I tried to slice it in half-ish...Yeah, it was 1.1 pounds. She was impatient and said, "Whatever. I'll take it." Seriously, what the hell did this woman expect!? I was flying blind! I can get stuff right on the dot if I'm slicing it, but not in a chunk!!
Customer 2- "I need half a pound of salami." I told her we were out of hard salami, but that we had Genoa Salami. She rolled her eyes, but said that was fine. When I asked how she wanted it, she said "THIN!" So, I sliced it thin and showed it to her to check, she said, "THINNER!" Seriously, she wanted the shit see-through. Whatever. All I know is that it was jamming the slicer and I had to keep fighting with it, which apparently pissed the lady off, although I don't know why because she wasn't the one wrestling with the machine. Nor did she have to worry about slicing off her fingers and destroying the store's record of 6 months without an employee accident!! She got mad and said, "I'll take whatever you cut already. I have things to do." I said, "Give me just a second, please. I'll get it, but the machine is jamming." She continued to get more pissed at me, as though I could remedy the situation...Whatever. Even another woman in line saw that the woman was being outrageous and that I was fighting with the machine, not getting upset with the woman. Who the hell gets see-through meat anyway!? It's not freakin' piscutto (I don't know how to spell it...It's like bacon, but sliced thinly and doesn't need to be cooked...). When I gave it to her, she said, "It's for a Brazilians recipe I have." I smiled and told her have a good day, but I thought, "Yeah, because Brazilians are known for their love of salami!" *rolls eyes*
Customer 3- This woman came up and as I asked, "How can I help you?" She slams a huge chub of chopped ham on the counter and growls, "Cut this on a one!" Just as I was about to say that I'm not sure I'm allowed to do that, she glared at me and I saw "customer complaint" written all over her face, so I didn't argue. I cut all three pounds of this stupid chub of nasty, fake ham for her. While I did this, a huge line formed at the deli and all this woman did was yell at her kids. Like I couldn't get done with it quickly enough. I found out a few moments after I was done helping her that she's been told repeatedly, even by the managers, that we aren't allowed to do it for her, but she still comes over and yells at anyone who disagrees with her...Good thing I just gave her her way...Although, next time she comes back, we're going to have problems...It's people like her that make reaffirm my belief that children should not be taken out of the house in dirty clothes and without shoes. Sure, it's Phoenix and it's warm, but this doesn't mean kids should be running around shoeless...That's so white trash.
I know, you guys are thinking, "Umm...Haven't you seen that email with the pics of the Walmart shoppers? Didn't you expect this?" Yes, I suppose I did, but I don't deal well with stupidity and grossness. Is that a word? It should be. Our customers, okay not all of them, but a lot of them, are just plain gross. They're trashy and...Never mind. I'm going to stop before I sound snobbish...Here's the thing though, I've never heard of anyone so poor that they could not afford manners, but apparently, that's what's wrong with so many of our customers...Remember folks, good manners are free and should be used liberally.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Just plain ridiculous!
I think I am about to just give up...on just about everything. (Not Phoenix though...I have to clarify that only because I fear she will read this and think I mean her too, which I don't.) I get it, you know, that life is hard, it's an uphill battle, it's insert-cliche'-here...Whatever. I don't make lemonade from the lemons being thrown at me each day. No, I'm the one still trying to struggle through it all and getting smacked in the face by these flying lemons and I'm slipping and falling on the ones which have already hit the ground. To sum up, I'm not doing well. Plus, I have a paper cut on my finger and I think I just got lemon juice in it.
Perhaps you think I exaggerate...I don't. Well, sometimes I do for storytelling purposes, you understand, but in this case, I'm just not; it's not necessary. Allow me to explain.
My stuff from Chapman was supposed to be processed last week. It's not freakin' processed. I know people who became teachers without having any bit of trouble, but for me, it's been nothing but one bullshit problem after another! Is it a sign that this isn't what I'm supposed to do? If so, wouldn't it have been easier for me to drive past a sign on the freeway that read, "Heather, do not be a teacher! Love, The Universe"? Seriously. Oh for the love of all that is holy, this is just plain ridiculous! Here I am, writing this blog, talking smack and I just got an email from Chapman University saying that my stuff has now been processed. Excuse me for a moment while I angrily shake my fist at the sky. *shakes fist angrily at the sky* Only me, I'm telling you...I think I was supposed to be a stand-up comedian because of how crazy and ridiculous my life is. Bah!
At work, I asked for Sundays and Mondays off because those are Phoenix's days off...Yesterday the new schedules were posted and I get Saturdays and Sundays. I know, you're thinking, "Awesome!" Yes, but perhaps you missed which days off Phoenix has. BAH! Also, they decided that Monday-Thursday we only need two girls at night and that started last night with me and Tortilla. And they gave us a list of cleaning duties to be done by today, which was passed along to our deli boss last week. Umm...What took a week to get it out??? Yeah, we skipped like half the stuff on the list. I'm sure I'll get yelled at today, but he wasted two hours of Tortilla's time making her stock the bakery stuff that came in the order (cookies, brownies, bread, rolls, etc) that should've been done by the girls in the morning. We didn't get out of work until 11pm and I was technically off at 9:30. Grrr!
Here are a few other highlights from last night...The hose we use to clean the floors wasn't working properly last week and last night basically crapped out. Nothing quite like washing a floor by tossing buckets of soapy water on the floor, then scrubbing with a brush, and then tossing out buckets of clean water to rinse. I had to change the oil on the fryers only to find that the fryers were so dirty that the crumbs clogged the hose, so I got to ladle God-only-knows how much oil from the filter with a small pan into the container I had to roll back to the backroom to dispose of. These fryers are big too, not like the ones you see at BK or Mickey-Dee's, so we're talking like 20 gallons or more of oil, okay? It took a LONG LONG LONG LONG TIME! Then the container, which is supposed to be big enough to hold the oil from both fryer, was full after only one, which sucks. So, I go back to the back room and then use the vacuum thing that's supposed to suck it out of the container and into a holding unit. Yeah, it didn't work. I found a night manager guy to help and he helped a bit, but the machine would start and stop in the middle of sucking it all out. It was utter bullshit. I wasted like an hour and a half trying to do the fryers. It should've taken less than thirty minutes! Before this though, I watched an older Mexican man come in and get potato wedges from me and then walk out the door without paying. I was alone in the deli at the time though so I didn't do anything. I certainly wasn't going to chase him down. Nice, huh? OH! And then there was the crazy woman who got pissed at me at 9:35 because I wouldn't cut her a buttload of meat when the sign right in front of her face told her that we are closed at 9pm. Apparently, according to this woman, because I was still there I was to serve her and it didn't matter that I had been busily cleaning the bakery oven, basically from the inside because it's not an easy oven to clean. (When I explained it to Phoenix, she immediately said, "Like Hansel and Gretal?" I wasn't actually in the oven, but close...) I didn't serve the evil woman and I told her to have a great night, even when she threatened to tell my manager...Oh well.
Well, I could go on, but I have to get ready to head back to hell...I'm about to give up though. I feel the life being sucked out of me each day I walk into Walmart. What scares me the most is that the people there (IE- cashiers, pharmacy techs, etc) are all starting to know who I am and talk to me whenever they get a chance...It's like a scary cult and they're trying to pull me in. I've been resisting them, but how long can I go on like this??? Oh man, they're going to make me drink the Kool-Aid, huh??? Well, as long as it's the Black Cherry kind I like so much, I guess it won't be bad...
Perhaps you think I exaggerate...I don't. Well, sometimes I do for storytelling purposes, you understand, but in this case, I'm just not; it's not necessary. Allow me to explain.
My stuff from Chapman was supposed to be processed last week. It's not freakin' processed. I know people who became teachers without having any bit of trouble, but for me, it's been nothing but one bullshit problem after another! Is it a sign that this isn't what I'm supposed to do? If so, wouldn't it have been easier for me to drive past a sign on the freeway that read, "Heather, do not be a teacher! Love, The Universe"? Seriously. Oh for the love of all that is holy, this is just plain ridiculous! Here I am, writing this blog, talking smack and I just got an email from Chapman University saying that my stuff has now been processed. Excuse me for a moment while I angrily shake my fist at the sky. *shakes fist angrily at the sky* Only me, I'm telling you...I think I was supposed to be a stand-up comedian because of how crazy and ridiculous my life is. Bah!
At work, I asked for Sundays and Mondays off because those are Phoenix's days off...Yesterday the new schedules were posted and I get Saturdays and Sundays. I know, you're thinking, "Awesome!" Yes, but perhaps you missed which days off Phoenix has. BAH! Also, they decided that Monday-Thursday we only need two girls at night and that started last night with me and Tortilla. And they gave us a list of cleaning duties to be done by today, which was passed along to our deli boss last week. Umm...What took a week to get it out??? Yeah, we skipped like half the stuff on the list. I'm sure I'll get yelled at today, but he wasted two hours of Tortilla's time making her stock the bakery stuff that came in the order (cookies, brownies, bread, rolls, etc) that should've been done by the girls in the morning. We didn't get out of work until 11pm and I was technically off at 9:30. Grrr!
Here are a few other highlights from last night...The hose we use to clean the floors wasn't working properly last week and last night basically crapped out. Nothing quite like washing a floor by tossing buckets of soapy water on the floor, then scrubbing with a brush, and then tossing out buckets of clean water to rinse. I had to change the oil on the fryers only to find that the fryers were so dirty that the crumbs clogged the hose, so I got to ladle God-only-knows how much oil from the filter with a small pan into the container I had to roll back to the backroom to dispose of. These fryers are big too, not like the ones you see at BK or Mickey-Dee's, so we're talking like 20 gallons or more of oil, okay? It took a LONG LONG LONG LONG TIME! Then the container, which is supposed to be big enough to hold the oil from both fryer, was full after only one, which sucks. So, I go back to the back room and then use the vacuum thing that's supposed to suck it out of the container and into a holding unit. Yeah, it didn't work. I found a night manager guy to help and he helped a bit, but the machine would start and stop in the middle of sucking it all out. It was utter bullshit. I wasted like an hour and a half trying to do the fryers. It should've taken less than thirty minutes! Before this though, I watched an older Mexican man come in and get potato wedges from me and then walk out the door without paying. I was alone in the deli at the time though so I didn't do anything. I certainly wasn't going to chase him down. Nice, huh? OH! And then there was the crazy woman who got pissed at me at 9:35 because I wouldn't cut her a buttload of meat when the sign right in front of her face told her that we are closed at 9pm. Apparently, according to this woman, because I was still there I was to serve her and it didn't matter that I had been busily cleaning the bakery oven, basically from the inside because it's not an easy oven to clean. (When I explained it to Phoenix, she immediately said, "Like Hansel and Gretal?" I wasn't actually in the oven, but close...) I didn't serve the evil woman and I told her to have a great night, even when she threatened to tell my manager...Oh well.
Well, I could go on, but I have to get ready to head back to hell...I'm about to give up though. I feel the life being sucked out of me each day I walk into Walmart. What scares me the most is that the people there (IE- cashiers, pharmacy techs, etc) are all starting to know who I am and talk to me whenever they get a chance...It's like a scary cult and they're trying to pull me in. I've been resisting them, but how long can I go on like this??? Oh man, they're going to make me drink the Kool-Aid, huh??? Well, as long as it's the Black Cherry kind I like so much, I guess it won't be bad...
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Spy vs. Spy
I'm sure that by now, most of you have seen that my URL thingy for this blog is The White Spy and you may have wondered why...Allow me to explain. This is due to an on-going battle with an old friend...She is the Black Spy (Or BS for short. HAHAHA!) and I am the White Spy. We used to talk smack to each other all the time on MySpace, but that's fizzled out since she currently doesn't have access to Internet, but when she gets it again, I expect it to be on once more. (Oh, who are we kidding? We've been smack talking each other since middle school!) During our time of smack talking each other, we decided that it would be funny to have "alter egos" of a sort, like we are Anna and Heather the good buddies by day and The White Spy and Black Spy by night plotting each other's death. Plus, during out times of smack talking each other on MySpace, we convinced all sorts of people that we hated each other...Mostly because we did our smack talking on other people's pages, which made it that much funnier.
Right about now, you may be thinking, "What's the point of this? Is there a point?" There is a point...I am setting this up to show the pictures of what I made BS for her birthday. I had decided that I wanted to make her a bomb cake...not as in "cool", but as in "Oh my God, is that going to blow up!?" I looked up bomb cakes and found this:
Apparently, that was done with cake...Yeah, I'm not that cool yet in my cake carving abilities, but luckily for me, I watch a lot of cake shows and challenges, so I've picked up a thing or two...Like that Rice Krispie treats can be used to odd shapes that are hard to make with cake! Bwahahaha!! So, I made my bomb with Rice Krispies, fondant (which I had never worked with), spray food coloring (save your $3.50 and don't buy this shit!), and regular food coloring. I made the treats and let them cool just enough that I could handle them without receiving third degree burns on my fingers and I shaped it into the general shape of a bomb. I let that harden in the fridge. I then rolled out the fondant and put it over it, trimming off the extra. When morning came, I sprayed on the black food coloring stuff...OMG! It came out purple!! Not like purple-purple, but like lavender with a little black mixed in...This is the color you get when you make black with yellow, blue, and red, apparently, which is what the ingredients listed. BAH!
I went to go see Where the Wild Things Are before I went to get more food coloring...I didn't care for the movie all that much. We'll discuss that more in another blog. I then went to Target and bought food coloring. All they had were the basic colors (red, blue, green, and yellow). I bought it along with a water color set of paints for the paint brush. (It was either the set of paint for 94 cents or a set of brushes for $2.49...hmmm....) Once back at my mom's, I mixed the colors together in hopes of creating black. What I got instead was a really dark green!! HAHAHAHAHA!! I swear I paid attention in art class! I didn't have time to mess with it anymore and I wasn't going to go trekking around town anymore, so I called it good and painted it green. Here's what I ended up with:
Here I am dropping it off:
Hahaha! Just kidding...kind of.
Here's the Black Spy with Mini Black Spy and the cake...
And finally, here they are, eating it, which proves it wasn't poisoned. And it proves once and for all that the White Spy is not evil...*shifty eyes*
So, yeah...There's my bomb "cake" of sorts...I had so much fun making it. I am going to keep making crazy cakes and such. It's great to see the look on people's faces when you give them cool cakes...Like they get all excited. It's a nice feeling to know you made them something that makes them so happy.
Right about now, you may be thinking, "What's the point of this? Is there a point?" There is a point...I am setting this up to show the pictures of what I made BS for her birthday. I had decided that I wanted to make her a bomb cake...not as in "cool", but as in "Oh my God, is that going to blow up!?" I looked up bomb cakes and found this:
Apparently, that was done with cake...Yeah, I'm not that cool yet in my cake carving abilities, but luckily for me, I watch a lot of cake shows and challenges, so I've picked up a thing or two...Like that Rice Krispie treats can be used to odd shapes that are hard to make with cake! Bwahahaha!! So, I made my bomb with Rice Krispies, fondant (which I had never worked with), spray food coloring (save your $3.50 and don't buy this shit!), and regular food coloring. I made the treats and let them cool just enough that I could handle them without receiving third degree burns on my fingers and I shaped it into the general shape of a bomb. I let that harden in the fridge. I then rolled out the fondant and put it over it, trimming off the extra. When morning came, I sprayed on the black food coloring stuff...OMG! It came out purple!! Not like purple-purple, but like lavender with a little black mixed in...This is the color you get when you make black with yellow, blue, and red, apparently, which is what the ingredients listed. BAH!
I went to go see Where the Wild Things Are before I went to get more food coloring...I didn't care for the movie all that much. We'll discuss that more in another blog. I then went to Target and bought food coloring. All they had were the basic colors (red, blue, green, and yellow). I bought it along with a water color set of paints for the paint brush. (It was either the set of paint for 94 cents or a set of brushes for $2.49...hmmm....) Once back at my mom's, I mixed the colors together in hopes of creating black. What I got instead was a really dark green!! HAHAHAHAHA!! I swear I paid attention in art class! I didn't have time to mess with it anymore and I wasn't going to go trekking around town anymore, so I called it good and painted it green. Here's what I ended up with:
Here I am dropping it off:
Hahaha! Just kidding...kind of.
Here's the Black Spy with Mini Black Spy and the cake...
And finally, here they are, eating it, which proves it wasn't poisoned. And it proves once and for all that the White Spy is not evil...*shifty eyes*
So, yeah...There's my bomb "cake" of sorts...I had so much fun making it. I am going to keep making crazy cakes and such. It's great to see the look on people's faces when you give them cool cakes...Like they get all excited. It's a nice feeling to know you made them something that makes them so happy.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Oh, the horror!!
Apparently when I agreed to work at Walmart Neighborhood Market (And I'm sorry, but I feel as though calling it a "Neighborhood Market" makes it sound friendly, when in fact, it's not friendly at all...It's like a wolf in sheep's clothing!! Oh those clever Walmart people and their clever tricks!!), I guess I also agreed to work every day for them, day in and day out, because I am now their slave. Yes, I said it, A SLAVE!! I bet you're thinking, "Umm...Heather, slavery was abolished by Andrew Jackson all those years ago." Well, you're wrong. It was abolished by Lincoln, bozo! Bwahahaha! But I digress...Yes, one would think that slavery had been abolished, but apparently, being that Walmart is an international company now, they choose which laws they folllow and they choose not to follow the United States' laws...C'mon, we all know they have poor kids working in sweatshops to provide such low prices on clothes...And this also explains why the clothes fall apart so quickly...
I worked on Friday night, which was also Family Game Night. I knew it would only be me and one other girl who's still rather new, but I had hope that we could get out of there early enough for me to make an appearance at Game Night...Plus, I told her that I couldn't be there all night since I was leaving for Cali in the morning....Yeah, whatever. The dumb girl, who I believe I called Lenny in a previous blog, let me do all the work! Okay, you caught me; I'm totally exaggerating...She cleaned the hot case. I did everything else--the fryers, the cold case, the slicers, the dishes (even though my hands broke out into the rash again and worse than before), the rotisary oven, bagged all the bread, the floors, and God only knows what else. Oh yeah...She also put trash bags into the trashcans, which apparently takes like 10-15 minutes if you're a complete ass monkey. We got out at 11pm and I was dead ass tired...like I wanted to cry because I had to walk half-way across the parking lot to get to the car and my feet hurt. Yeah, it was like I was the slave all night. So, I totally missed Family Game Night!! Phoenix and I were the ones who had thought we should have the Game Night and now I'm missing it!! *growls*
Whilst in Cali, I got a call asking if I could work on Monday night. I said, "I won't be home until sometime late on Monday since I'm in California." The assistant store manager said she understood. She's being cool with me because I agreed to work like all week and asked only for Sunday's and Mondays off (Starting next week)...She agreed. Although, she threw in the stipulation that I would sometimes come in, if possible, if she called me in on a Sunday or Monday...Whatever. Plus, she also knows I'm one of like two people who actually do any work in that damned deli!! So, then on the way home last night, Phoenix makes some joke about them calling me in tonight. I said I should go in if they do since I need the hours, but she demanded that I not go in because I'll start working all the extra hours next week...I think she just wanted me to go to Noble Tuesday tonight because it's the last one. (Now it's going to be Noble Monday...Well, something like that. We're working on a catchy name.) Sure enough, because she jinxed me, this morning my phone rang and I let it go to voicemail because it showed it was hell calling. I heard the message, "Get your ass back to work slave!!" (Or something to that effect!) Phoenix said if I wanted to go to work she would drop me off at 12:30 before she went to work and leave me there to wait for my 3pm shift...Yup, she loves me. I get it--sharing a car blows, but really? I wouldn't drop her off three and half hours before her shift. Anyway, so I called back and told them I was still in California. Now I'm hiding out in my apartment so no one sees me. Nice, huh?
I find myself wondering though--Are there no other people they can call in? Why is it me they keep calling??? I have a theory as to why they keep calling me in...They aren't allowing me time to look for a better job. I think that's what it comes down to. Those bastards...(I'll blog about the trip to Cali later...For now I have to clean house...BAH!)
I worked on Friday night, which was also Family Game Night. I knew it would only be me and one other girl who's still rather new, but I had hope that we could get out of there early enough for me to make an appearance at Game Night...Plus, I told her that I couldn't be there all night since I was leaving for Cali in the morning....Yeah, whatever. The dumb girl, who I believe I called Lenny in a previous blog, let me do all the work! Okay, you caught me; I'm totally exaggerating...She cleaned the hot case. I did everything else--the fryers, the cold case, the slicers, the dishes (even though my hands broke out into the rash again and worse than before), the rotisary oven, bagged all the bread, the floors, and God only knows what else. Oh yeah...She also put trash bags into the trashcans, which apparently takes like 10-15 minutes if you're a complete ass monkey. We got out at 11pm and I was dead ass tired...like I wanted to cry because I had to walk half-way across the parking lot to get to the car and my feet hurt. Yeah, it was like I was the slave all night. So, I totally missed Family Game Night!! Phoenix and I were the ones who had thought we should have the Game Night and now I'm missing it!! *growls*
Whilst in Cali, I got a call asking if I could work on Monday night. I said, "I won't be home until sometime late on Monday since I'm in California." The assistant store manager said she understood. She's being cool with me because I agreed to work like all week and asked only for Sunday's and Mondays off (Starting next week)...She agreed. Although, she threw in the stipulation that I would sometimes come in, if possible, if she called me in on a Sunday or Monday...Whatever. Plus, she also knows I'm one of like two people who actually do any work in that damned deli!! So, then on the way home last night, Phoenix makes some joke about them calling me in tonight. I said I should go in if they do since I need the hours, but she demanded that I not go in because I'll start working all the extra hours next week...I think she just wanted me to go to Noble Tuesday tonight because it's the last one. (Now it's going to be Noble Monday...Well, something like that. We're working on a catchy name.) Sure enough, because she jinxed me, this morning my phone rang and I let it go to voicemail because it showed it was hell calling. I heard the message, "Get your ass back to work slave!!" (Or something to that effect!) Phoenix said if I wanted to go to work she would drop me off at 12:30 before she went to work and leave me there to wait for my 3pm shift...Yup, she loves me. I get it--sharing a car blows, but really? I wouldn't drop her off three and half hours before her shift. Anyway, so I called back and told them I was still in California. Now I'm hiding out in my apartment so no one sees me. Nice, huh?
I find myself wondering though--Are there no other people they can call in? Why is it me they keep calling??? I have a theory as to why they keep calling me in...They aren't allowing me time to look for a better job. I think that's what it comes down to. Those bastards...(I'll blog about the trip to Cali later...For now I have to clean house...BAH!)
Friday, October 16, 2009
And so it continues...
I was told the other day, by the woman at the local campus of Chapman (Or Brandman University, as they call themselves now...I wish I had $10 million to donate to a school so they'd call it Heather University...Or perhaps, The White Spy University...Bwahahah!), that if I was not able to post my fees for my credential by Friday, then I should contact her...But the woman at the main campus had promised to process my stuff right away, you know, so it shouldn't happen. Mmmm-hmmm, and I shouldn't crave cigarettes anymore because it's been about 10 months since I quit, but hey, shit happens, or so the bumper stickers tell me. So, I checked yesterday to see if I could post my fees, but I couldn't. I tried again this morning and then only moments ago and still, it was a no go. Seriously, what's the problem here???
Let me give you a break down of all the crap I did for school...I got a TB test. I was fingerprinted. I went to all the stupid classes, even though I swear that a few of them were the same exact class secretly guised under different names. Not only did I take these classes and do all the stupid work, but I got A's in all of the classes. Why? Because it was work a child could do! But I digress. I did their stupid final projects, which taught me absolutely nothing, but since I'm a good liar when I need to be, I acted as though I had learned oh-so-much. *rolls eyes* All I learned was how to hone my bullshitting skills...Then I sat through their hellish interview where I had four women judging me on everything and the only thing they could say was that I said, "Um" and "You know?", which is unprofessional, and that they would've liked to have seen more reflection from me. Yeah, good thing they took more than five minutes to go through that portfolio I spent a few days putting together. I'll guarantee they didn't read everything I wrote. Plus, texting and shuffling through papers was obviously more important to the one woman who also doubles as an advisor...Yeah, I'm glad she's on my side. And no, I'm not bitter because these women gave me a lousy passing score. I should've gotten the highest possible score, but whatever. Obviously they don't know who I am...Or perhaps they do and think I'm too egotistical, which meant that they had to knock me down a couple of notches...Eh, whatever. So, yeah, these were some of the hoops I had to jump through...You know, besides the unpaid student teaching stint!! Bastards.
So, after all that, they cannot seem to process my paperwork to allow me to get my stupid credential. Don't they know that I have over-extended myself on student loans and need a real job so I can pay back Sallie Mae before they send the student loan police after me. Bah! Why can't things just go easily???
Let me give you a break down of all the crap I did for school...I got a TB test. I was fingerprinted. I went to all the stupid classes, even though I swear that a few of them were the same exact class secretly guised under different names. Not only did I take these classes and do all the stupid work, but I got A's in all of the classes. Why? Because it was work a child could do! But I digress. I did their stupid final projects, which taught me absolutely nothing, but since I'm a good liar when I need to be, I acted as though I had learned oh-so-much. *rolls eyes* All I learned was how to hone my bullshitting skills...Then I sat through their hellish interview where I had four women judging me on everything and the only thing they could say was that I said, "Um" and "You know?", which is unprofessional, and that they would've liked to have seen more reflection from me. Yeah, good thing they took more than five minutes to go through that portfolio I spent a few days putting together. I'll guarantee they didn't read everything I wrote. Plus, texting and shuffling through papers was obviously more important to the one woman who also doubles as an advisor...Yeah, I'm glad she's on my side. And no, I'm not bitter because these women gave me a lousy passing score. I should've gotten the highest possible score, but whatever. Obviously they don't know who I am...Or perhaps they do and think I'm too egotistical, which meant that they had to knock me down a couple of notches...Eh, whatever. So, yeah, these were some of the hoops I had to jump through...You know, besides the unpaid student teaching stint!! Bastards.
So, after all that, they cannot seem to process my paperwork to allow me to get my stupid credential. Don't they know that I have over-extended myself on student loans and need a real job so I can pay back Sallie Mae before they send the student loan police after me. Bah! Why can't things just go easily???
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