Okay, that's probably a lie, but it sounds good to me...All joking aside, I don't belong at Walmart. I don't want to say that I'm too good to work there, but it's just not right. I really don't belong there...not even for the great blog material...
Yesterday was my orientation, which pretty much sent me into a nervous breakdown and not the good kind that makes for funny venting blogs, but the kind where I'm just pissed at the world and mostly at myself and everything just makes me more pissed. I spent a little over two hours yesterday listing to this lady going on and on about their policies. Here's my favorite policy: You are only allowed three unexcused absences before you get a warning (like a talking to) in a rolling six-month period. Okay, I know that doesn't sound bad, but let me explain about the absences...Excused absences are like if you're stuck in court or a family member dies. Stop laughing, I'm not kidding. Unexcused absences are illness, car accidents, don't feel like coming in, etc...Seriously. I asked, "For the sake of argument, let's say I get sick with bronchitis and go to the doctor and I bring you a note showing I'm sick. Would that be excused?" She said, "Nope. Although, if you miss three days in a row because you're sick, that's only one unexcused absence, not three." Oh goody. It's nice that calling out with pneumonia ranks up there with "Oh, I don't feel like coming in today because I want to watch Ellen." Morons.
Today I had to be there at 7am for training. Basically, I sat at a computer terminal all day and watched these stupid training power point-type presentations and then took quizzes. I went through 24/28 training modules (as they call them). On the plus side, I am now familiar with Walmart's idea of ethics, can use a power jack (to move pallets of crap), and know all about how Walmart cares about diversity. (Funny that in the diversity videos the only white people were women and that the "managers" had accents from all around the world.) Oh yeah, and I also know that African Americans spend the most amount of money at Walmart. Each year African Americans spend about $360 billion, while Hispanics only spend about $320 billion...Something like that.
So, aside from the boring snooze-fest training crap, I was having other issues today...Firstly, I realized that I used to enjoy my breaks at work better when I was a smoker. There was something satisfying about breaks back then. Now I'm just bored. I actually skipped one of my breaks today because I had nothing to do...Seriously. Secondly, I nearly walked out this afternoon when I went on my last break of the day. I went into the bathrooms which are gross because our bathrooms are the same as the customers. Blech. I go in and go about my business when I realize that the woman in the stall next to me is puking her brains out. *gags* I have no desire to work with the public. I don't think I've ever gone pee so quickly in my life. I couldn't get out of the bathroom fast enough. Then I went to sit outside (I needed fresh air after listening to her.) and I watched the people come and go. (I wasn't outside smoking...Just watching people.) The people are ghetto. I saw some Mexican people coming out of the store and the little boys were kicking the ever living hell out of each other. It reminded me of this:
The Mexican boys were kicking each other in the butt, but still...They couldn't have been more than like 8. And the moms just stood by watching. Then the one boy came walking up to me and said, "Who you?" I asked, "Who're you?" He said, "Nothing!" And then ran off to kick his brother/cousin/friend/enemy again. WTF? Here's a little boy who thinks it's okay to answer "Nothing" when I ask who he is!! Where the hell is his English teacher??? And there I am, wasting my life away answering ridiculous questions so that they can train me in the deli instead of teaching little Mexican boys to answer questions properly!
Oh yeah...Want to hear the kicker? I have to wear a flippin' hair net! A HAIR NET! I've never had to wear a hair net in all my time of working fast food! (Well, except for like a week at Pizza Hut when the DM was on a rampage...) I would wear a baseball cap any day, but a hair net!? Shoot me now.
No, really. Shoot me. I'm not even looking forward to working with some of the girls in the deli. Yesterday, I got a walk-through look of the deli and the bakery girl barely said a hello when we were introduced and the deli lady looked me over and said nothing. Today I met a girl who works in the deli. She was in the break room while I was training, so she introduced herself and a guy who works by the deli, whatever that means. They seemed nice enough, but what bothered me is that nearly everyone who took a break while I was in the office going through my training modules tried to talk to me. Did they not see me with the headphones on my ears (They didn't have speakers, just the headphones.) and clicking away at the computer? Apparently not. It was more important to find out if I was a new over-nighter or what my job was. It was nice for them to say hi, but really, they're all just nosy because it would appear that at every job people live for the latest gossip. This is not where I belong...
Yeah, so basically it all just sucks. On the plus side, my schedule for right now is Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday...I'm cool with that. Still, it's killing me. I'm Heather. I majored in English. I'm freakin' smart. I got good grades. I worked so hard and did everything I was supposed to do and yet here I am...At a shitty dead-end job. Whatever. Be looking for the blogs about the people I will see...I'm telling you--Ghetto people. Should make for good times for you guys.
No comments:
Post a Comment